Under Siege

Over the last week or so I have felt myself under siege - from sources that, in retrospect, I shouldn't have given a second thought. But it got to me, I let it. It slipped in under my skin and lodged itself there in a most uncomfortable fashion.

In this unnecessary state of anxiety I went downtown to run some errands. In the first store I went into my query was answered in a short, snappy fashion by the shop assistant and I completely took it on board. I tried to stop myself - I walked out of the store telling myself over and over "It's not about you. Not everything is about you. She's obviously having a bad day. Anything could have happened. You just walked in at the wrong moment." It didn't help. I was already under siege, and the shop assistant's curt response added more weight to the world that was on my shoulders.

Crushed, I sulked up the street and into the next store. I was so caught up in my woeful thoughts that I almost missed the brilliant smile and the cheery "Have a nice day!" from the checkout girl in the supermarket. I almost completely ignored her, which would have left her feeling like crap too. Almost. Just in time I caught myself. I stopped, looked at her, smiled, and gave her a genuinely grateful "Thank you."

Genuinely grateful because she reminded me of something I knew - but forgot. There's a balance at work in the world. For every up there's a down. For every high there's a low. Most importantly, for every demon, there's an angel. When we feel ourselves under attack from somebody or somebodies being thoughtless, unkind - even cruel - we need to look around. Somewhere there's an angel. And while it's human nature to hear and pay attention to the mean and nasty stuff, with a slight shift of focus we can see how much love and kindness and support comes our way to balance it out.